Friday, April 13, 2007
Do You Remember Me
I salute the soldiers, airmen, sailors for their selfless sacrifice and have no respect for those who want to turn tail and run.
Wednesday, April 11, 2007
Snickers Galore
1) NUDITY
I was driving with my three young children one warm summer evening when a woman in the convertible ahead of us stood up and waved. She was stark naked! As I was reeling from the shock, I heard my 5-year-old shout from the back seat, "Mom, that lady isn't wearing a seat belt!"
2) OPINIONS
On the first day of school, a first-grader handed his teacher a note from his mother. The note read, "The opinions expressed by this child are not necessarily those of his parents."
3) KETCHUP
A woman was trying hard to get the ketchup out of the jar. During her struggle the phone rang so she asked her 4-year-old daughter to answer the phone. "Mommy can't come to the phone to talk to you right now. She's hitting the bottle."
4) MORE NUDITY
A little boy got lost at the YMCA and found himself in the women's locker room. When he was spotted, the room burst into shrieks, with ladies grabbing towels and running for cover. The little boy watched in amazement and then asked, "What's the matter, haven't you ever seen a little boy before?"
5) POLICE # 1
While taking a routine vandalism report at an elementary school, I was interrupted by a little girl about 6 years old. Looking up and down at my uniform, she asked, "Are you a cop?"
"Yes," I answered and continued writing the report.
"My mother said if I ever needed help I should ask the police. Is that right?"
"Yes, that's right," I told her.
"Well, then," she said as she extended her foot toward me, "would you please tie my shoe?"
6) POLICE # 2
It was the end of the day when I parked my police van in front of the station. As I gathered my equipment, my K-9 partner, Jake, was barking, and I saw a little boy staring in at me "Is that a dog you got back there?" he
asked.
"It sure is," I replied.
Puzzled, the boy looked at me and then towards the back of the van. Finally he said, "What'd he do?"
7) ELDERLY
While working for an organization that delivers lunches to elderly shut-ins, I used to take my 4-year-old daughter on my afternoon rounds. She was unfailingly intrigued by the various appliances of old age, particularly the canes, walkers and wheelchairs. One day I found her staring at a pair of false teeth soaking in a glass. As I braced myself for the inevitable barrage of questions, she merely turned and whispered, "The tooth fairy will never believe this!"
8) DRESS-UP
A little girl was watching her parents dress for a party. When she saw her dad donning his tuxedo, she warned, "Daddy, you shouldn't wear that suit."
"And why not, darling?"
"You know that it always gives you a headache the next morning."
9) DEATH
While walking along the sidewalk in front of his church, our minister heard the intoning of a prayer that nearly made his collar wilt. Apparently, his 5-year-old son and his playmates had found a dead robin. Feeling that proper burial should be performed, they had secured a small box and cotton batting, then dug a hole and made ready for the disposal of the deceased. The minister's son was chosen to say the appropriate prayers and with sonorous dignity intoned his version of what he thought his father always said: "Glory be unto the Faaather, and unto the Sonnn, and into the hole he goooes."
10) SCHOOL
A little girl had just finished her first week of school. "I'm just wasting my time," she said to her mother. "I can't read, I can't write and they won't let me talk!"
11) BIBLE
A little boy opened the big family Bible. He was fascinated as he fingered through the old pages. Suddenly, something fell out of the Bible. He picked up the object and looked at it. What he saw was an old leaf that had been pressed in between the pages. "Mama, look what I found," the boy called out.
"What have you got there, dear?"
With astonishment in the young boy's voice, he answered, "I think it's Adam's underwear!
Snicker
Wild Mom misses our company so much she has found ways to get the police to come visit her. Seriously, she is ok just some underage driver parking their car in their neighborhood and walking to Middle School. She will attend Camp Bluebird next week and she will prance around the runway modeling Victoria’s Secret clothes.
Lady is now missing two wisdom teeth. I do not think she will be too playful tonight. Unless she had a good day at work and then all bets are off. Is it vacation time yet?
Starr spent some more time at PWC Hospital yesterday. Nothing serious and she got out of work, made it home for dinner and was loopy from the pain meds the doctor gave her. It must be old age catching up. Oh by the way, she is wearing black again. The brief exposure of color Sunday lasted that long … one day. Good thing someone took a picture.
Princess was her usual self. At one point she got the punch line messed up in a joke and called herself a dog. She had fun when her classmates did not realize she had glasses on until she changes them. In addition, guess who was so paranoid about them? We went to Yorkshire for dinner but she opted out in order to spend more time Sgt. JA. I wonder is being in love worth being a super dooper pooper-scooper?
##### #####
The Nationals continue …. 7-1 in their pursuit of a 100 loss Season.
Justice prevailed in the Duke case.
Do we need Solomon to divide the Anna Nicole baby between the two “fathers?”
Monday, April 09, 2007
Eggs and Candy ... Eyes or Fingers
Three of the Kids managed to wake up soon enough and attend the 11:00 service. Do you realize that they filled up a whole pew? Where would Lady and I have sat? I was nice seeing them there. Not many times, you get to see Starr in a dress and much less with some color other than black. You missed it.
#1 spent the day with friends and watched the snow come down. We all miss him a little bit. He is looking forward to his first pay raise. Wonder if he will share with us?
#2 stayed home with us this weekend and we had a good time. Even watching “Happy Feet” with Lew generated a few laughs.
Starr worked and visited with friends. Her appearance at church was a pleasant occasion. Wonder if that will become more common.
Princess has new glasses. They do change her looks but in a good way. No, I am not saying she did not look good before, rather they enhanced her face. We went bowling Saturday night and she entertained us with her bowling technique. With a little spring on her behind … she would have bounced back up on every shot.
Exacto Mundo
Your Hidden Talent |
You're super sensitive and easily able to understand situations. You tend to solve complex problems in a flash, without needing a lot of facts. Decision making is easy for you. You have killer intuition. The right path is always clear, and you're a bit of a visionary. |
Grins!!!
You are Wash (Ship Pilot)
| You are a pilot with a good if not silly sense of humor. You take pride in your collection of toys. You love your significant other. |
Click here to take the Serenity Personality Quiz
Do Really Think So?
| Your Birthdate: September 16 |
You're incredibly introverted and introspective. You live inside your head. You spend a lot of alone time meditating and thinking. People see you as withdrawn, and at times they are right. You are caring and deep, but it may be difficult for you to show this side of yourself. Your strength: Your original approach to thinking Your weakness: You tend to shy away from others Your power color: Pale blue Your power symbol: Wavy line Your power month: July |
Friday, April 06, 2007
Hotter than a Greased Skillet
Easter week continues and there has been much to contemplate. The first question that got me going is “are you a Christian or a “real” Christian?” The second one was “what have you done with what Christ has done for you? The Thursday night service was great but I wish the first time I sing a song with the choir was not the first time I saw the song.
Tuesday, April 03, 2007
Grrrr
I saw a sign in Chicago on my way home . It read "Hit a worker -- $1000 Fine and 14 Years! Now that is a great idea and I pray the Judges uphold it. A bit later I saw where someone added to another sign. It read "Hit a worker -- $1000 Fine and 14 Years! --- FINAL ANSWER
Didn't Senator Pelosi get the picture before she took on the mantle of "Jane Fonda of Syria?" It didn't work then so why would it work now? Looks like she is a media hound with no respect on where it comes from. Cut the funding to the men on the firing line and then suck up to our enemies. That sound like something a democrat would do.
Congrats Gators ... Maybe they will put up a sign in Ohio ... OHIO State University Campus --- The Northern Division of the University of Florida! Would that mean a Florida resident would get in state tuition rates?
Monday, April 02, 2007
Ho Hum, it's back to work I go
Work has not changed and neither has the people. I can already see that some of them did not take any computer skills enhancement courses while I was away. I wonder if they will ever do a study on the correlation between computer skills and common sense. There seems to be a direct relationship between them.
Wild Mom is already setting her sights on Camp Blue Bird in 3 weeks. Now I have to find some time to go back down there and do more sonny-do’s.
Lady is glad to be back. Work is still not her favorite past time but she endures. It seems her work tried the new concept of tire life management by putting a work truck on four blocks minus its tires. Great for tread life but productivity has really gone down.
#1 is still doing ok and recovering from the surprise “mom inspection” of the apartment. Lady did her best to furnish the place and get the fridge restocked with healthy food. Now we will have to see how long it takes some snow bunny to tie him down now that he is a man of means.
#2 is still looking. The driving practice will most likely resume now we are back home.
Starr is working and enduring life without wheels. Fire station life has settled down and entered the realm of routine. The next big challenge will be getting her room cleaned. Let me see 5-inch hose should do the trick.
Princess is adapting to life with one shoulder hurt. Therapy and healing will prove to be a drawn out event. Summer camp is now up in the air. What will we do if she stays home all summer? Booger keeps playing “let’s hide the pile” and she keeps tracking it down. Dare we say “she has an innate ability in sniffing them out” but of course she gets a break if Davis is there, she is great about ordering him on poop patrol. Will she get Brooke to do it too? Princess managed to appear in church Sunday without collapsing the walls. Of course, we managed to ignore the lightening bolts around her head. It must have been raining there since her hair was wet. Spring Break has arrived for her and she happily slept away the first day of it. She really looks cute when she first wakes up!
With Spring Training done, the watch begins to see if the Nationals can lose less than 100 games this year.
Go Gators
Special Deal
Saturday, March 31, 2007
Adventure - Recap
As I drove Wild Mom home I was reminded how different life is here in the backwaters of life. I saw a man swinging on a swing that was hanging from a branch of a large oak. He was asleep and his paper was blowing across the yard. It looked like a coffee cup was hanging from his sleepy fingers. This was Noon and I wonder what the afternoon had in store for him. More of the same? The urge not to return to the rat race is burning strong. It is not that I do not like life up there but I feel I am missing so much life down here. I am missing the simple things. Things that are sacrificed to cut the commute shorter work longer or squeeze that extra event into the schedule. I know the kids would hate this pace but oh, what memories they would have when they too tired of the rat race called life.
Over the next few days, I hope to catch up with my blogging and get, those many questions answered that are lurking in my inbox. However, for now, I have 5 hours to be mellow before reality descends and I am dragged screaming however silently, back into the race.
Friday, March 30, 2007
Adventure 6 - Home At Last
Wild Mom is anxious to get home, see her friends, and tell them of her great adventures in the Wild West. We will leave tomorrow with me flying back home on Saturday night.
Lady is ready to tackle her work backlog and to check out the kids.
#1 was his old self. Seeing him for only a few minutes was great. I am proud of him and how well he is making it on his own.
#2 is still looking for a job.
Starr managed to rearrange the front end of her car. At first I thought it was the same aggressive tree that attacked her rear, that is the van’s rear. However, it was not. Therefore, after a totaled car, a few bumps and bruises she is back in business however a little bit slower.
Princess managed to get herself hurt too. Anyone think, “Gotta be like sister?” Hers is a rotator cuff injury from not throwing the fire hose too well. Looks like she missed the part about hose throwing in the book or slept through the Davis’s demonstration. Maybe that explains why she always misses the target. Anyways we are looking at about 6 weeks of therapy to get it fixed. Her little summer jaunt to Boy Scout camp could be in jeopardy if therapy doesn’t fix her up. Booger is still his usual self.
More to come as “Life Turns in the Davis House”.
Sunday, March 25, 2007
Adventure 5
Wild Mom has her box of Krispy Kreme doughnuts for the ride home. Like most of us, she is coming home with the “wallet low money” light on.
With one final stop at the Bowling stadium, we will mosey over to the train station.
I am looking forward to the next few days of sleeping, watching the scenery and sleeping.
Saturday, March 24, 2007
Adventure 4
Friday, March 23, 2007
Adventure 3
Thursday, March 22, 2007
Adventure 2
Wednesday, March 21, 2007
Adventure 1
Tonight I had dinner with a Vietnam Vet. He was an Apache Indian and his father was a Wind Talker from World War II.
Of course, Wild mom is cold but having fun. She loved the dash between trains in Chicago and earned the new nickname, “Windy”. Lady is slowly getting rid of the cold. Yours truly is keeping everyone laughing. #1 is stocking up with doughnuts and coffee so he can pick up Lady at the train station in Denver at 7 am. Princess is wishing she had not missed the train. Starr is working harder than ever and with odder hours. Such is the life of a dispatcher.
